Tag Archives: wedding

A Burundi Wedding: Africa Day 4

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What would you do if you were asked to play a role in the wedding of a stranger? In another country? Where you don’t speak the local language?

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I recently wrote about attending a dowry ceremony in Burundi. My whole family was invited to attend the wedding the next day, even though we did not know the couple and were visiting from the U.S.

Yes, we did color coordinate our clothes. Photo credit: Danny J.

The wedding took place in a the couple’s church, a beautiful brick building shaped like a heart. It included performances by the choir and speeches with advice to the bride and groom. My family doesn’t speak Kirundi, but my sister-in-law whispered an English translation to us. The service also had a sign language interpreter for Deaf guests, and I could understand most of that.

Kirundi word of the day: Kaze (Welcome)

The couple prepares to be presented as man and wife.

According to the local tradition, asking someone to act as best man and matron of honor is also a request for lifelong mentorship and marriage counseling. The older friends who stood in this role for the newlyweds have a reputation for a stable, loving marriage despite challenging life circumstances.

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Jambo! Jambo bwana! Habari gani? Mzuri sana! Wageni wakaribishwa, Burundi yetu hakuna matata.

Hospitality is a strong value in Burundi, and we were offered seats of honor with the groom’s family during the reception. This accomplished the need to have someone stand in for the groom’s extended family members who couldn’t make it as well as the need to express a welcome to out-of-town guests.

I had another role, too. My sister-in-law made the wedding cake, and I had the job of walking up the aisle to deliver it to the couple!

A toast with Fanta Orange

It was quite an experience to see how Burundian weddings are done and to be able to appreciate the meaningful customs they observe. Getting invited to anyone’s wedding is an honor, and I always love having the chance to witness one of the most important moments of a couple’s life.

To read more about this wedding, visit World Footprints.

Africa Day 1: 30 Hours in Transit

Africa Day 2: Crossing Burundi

Africa Day 3: A Dowry Ceremony

Africa Day 5: Gisuru School for the Deaf

A Burundian Dowry Ceremony: Africa Day 3

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If you want to experience a traditional East African lifestyle, rural Burundi is a good place to go. You won’t have pavement or electricity or running water, but you will have the chance to discover local agriculture and artistry. Welcome to Gisuru, a small farming town deep in the hills.

While we were in Africa, my sister-in-law Annie, who lives in Gisuru, invited me to come with her to a Burundian dowry ceremony. This event happens shortly before a wedding, and it entails a dinner and a reception with the exchanging of gifts/bride, speeches, and a lot of soda.

More Africa Stories!
The happy couple. Photo credit: Abel N.

I couldn’t understand what anyone was saying, but I did enjoy the soda. Soda in Africa tastes better than American soda.

I might end up with a cavity by the end of this trip.

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Annie lent me a traditional dress. Photo credit: Danny J.

It’s Africa, so we expected the event to start late. We arrived two hours late and then waited an extra hour. I was in the car with Annie and four Burundians, and they taught me some Kirundi words in the meantime.

Carrying – you guessed it! – cases of soda. Photo credit: Abel N.

Kirundi word of the day: Fanta/soda. (Soda of any brand. Also a euphemism for “bribe,” so if someone asks for a “soda” they probably want money in exchange for a favor.)

Dinner was delicious—chicken, beef, rice, cabbage, and fried potatoes. We sat with the groom’s family, as we’d been asked to stand in for extended family members who couldn’t make it.

Carrying gifts to the dowry ceremony. Photo credit: Abel N.

Some of the events:

  • Dinner
  • Sodas
  • Traditional speeches: representative of the bride’s family takes turns with the groom’s representatives to publicly discuss the culmination of their bride price arrangements.
  • The family reiterates their acceptance of the terms and gifts arrive (more sodas, in this case).
  • The bride arrives with an entourage and the women vocalize their joy.
  • The brothers of the bride block the groom’s path to her until he gives them a gift.
  • Together, the two families sip a banana drink from a big bowl with straws.
  • The bride gives the groom a gift—new shoes.
  • The bride gives gifts to the parents.
  • More speeches.
  • More sodas.
  • More speeches.
  • More sodas.
The bride gave her groom new shoes.
Annie and I sitting with the groom’s family. Photo credit: Abel N.

It was a big day for the bride and groom. And the next day would be even bigger: their wedding day!

Africa Day 1: 30 Hours in Transit

Africa Day 2: Crossing Burundi

Africa Day 4: Burundian Wedding

Africa Day 5: Gisuru School for the Deaf

Bonfire

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Crackling flames, melting chocolate, and campfire songs. All the sounds and smells of summer are wrapped up in a bonfire under the stars. When the Johnson and Brown /Wilson families got together for Stevie and Kirsten’s wedding, we all gathered on the lawn of the farmhouse for a bonfire before the big day.

making a fire

bonfire
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Both families love to spend time together singing Gospel songs, reading the Bible, and praying. On the Johnson side, this time of family devotions is a nightly tradition that is being passed down through generations. We love to sing family classics that Ben’s mom wrote down years ago for his dad as a wedding gift. We also sing songs that Ben’s brother, Jesse, wrote, as well as French, Swahili, and Kirundi songs. With so many people from around the world present, we were able to sing some of the hymns in multiple languages, including American Sign Language, Spanish, and Arabic. Several of the family and friends present took turns leading worship songs to thank God for the good things He has done in our lives and praise Him for who He is.

IMG_3584 IMG_3603Check out the guitar Luke is playing. Jesse had it made out of an old hand-carved guitar neck and heavy-duty can.

can guitar

When the prayers had been said and the singing died away into the night, the smell of melted chocolate and roasted marshmallows began to permeate the air.

roasting marshmallowsIt was time for the time of day that the kids looked forward to most! Okay, I’ll be real– I was probably more excited about the marshmallows than the kids were. But I was good and I didn’t sneak more marshmallows than I was entitled to. chairs
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One by one, the chairs emptied. The fire died down to embers, and a lone guitar played soft tunes in the fading light. Ben poured water over the glowing embers, and they extinguished with a slow hiss. All around me, the fireflies flickered silently in the night. Inside the barn, the horse stomped his feet in the damp hay. I looked up and sighed with awe. Above me, a billion points of light pierced the velvety black of the night sky. It had been a long time since I’d seen the stars so clearly, and I could hardly look away. Even that night, as I lay in bed in the farmhouse, I kept my drooping eyelids open long enough to drink in the sight of the big dipper shining on me through the open window.

Pedi Party

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There’s nothing a girl loves more than to spend time getting pretty with friends and family!

In preparation for Stevie’s and Kirsten’s wedding, all of us ladies went out for some pampering. Brooke, a longtime friend of the Johnson family, decided to treat us all! It was time for some fun and memory making. We all piled in the van and drove through the country, into the town, and to the nail salon.

ladies

Some of use decided to go for pedicures and manicures both, and others chose one or the other. I decided to get a gel manicure, because I’m pretty hard on my hands and tend to chip off my nail polish within hours. It’s been a week since I got it done, and my nails still look great! I chose a mint color with a bluish tint that matched my dress for the wedding exactly.

manipedi

We all had a great time! It was the perfect way to relax and enjoy one another’s company before the big day. Don’t we look pretty with our polished nails?

mani pedi

The Last Wedding

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Well, it’s official—all the Johnson kids are married! Jesse and Joy were the first to get married 14 years ago almost to the day, and Stevie and Kirsten tied the knot last week, about two years after we did. The wedding was lovely, and it was a huge blessing to be there for it. My brother-in-law Jacob thought that “The Last Wedding” would be a good title for a blog post, so here you go!

family photo

Kirsten and Stevie met in high school at Rift Valley Academy, the Kenyan boarding school that Ben and all his siblings attended through high school. They met and started dating in 2010. I met both Stevie and Kirsten during my RVA visit in 2013. Stevie proposed on Lake Kivu in Rwanda last year, after their second year of long-distance dating in college.

stevie and kirsten

Kirsten’s grandparents live on a farm in New England, and the wedding was held in the front yard.

I Do sign

The flowers are all wildflowers that Kirsten and her bridesmaids picked from the rural countryside around the farm. The orange lilies were particularly lovely.

Flowers

Ben was a groomsman, and a rather dashing one! I loved the African cloth ties that the men in the wedding party wore. It was a nice touch of Tanzania to represent Stevie’s childhood.

Ben and his tie

The ceremony was beautiful. My nieces Esther and Emily were flower girls, they did a great job.

esther

emily

 

The pastor gave a wonderful message on love and the hand of God in our lives. Stevie and Kirsten’s relationship is and always has been centered around their love for God and for each other. It’s been cool to watch as their relationship has grown and finally come to result in the beautiful marriage we witnessed.

ceremonyparents

 

The bride and groom decided to do a sand ceremony, but with jelly beans instead of sand. One of our nephews, who shall remain anonymous, admitted to me in a whisper that he swiped one or two after the ceremony.

wedding photo

 

The Johnson family sang a song from Mom’s songbook during the ceremony. Unfortunately, my video didn’t catch everyone in the frame, but most of us are there!

singing at a wedding

Kirsten’s mom and aunt also sang a song together.

singing at a wedding

The parents gathered around the bride and groom to pray over them and their marriage.

prayer

And finally, the moment that Stevie and Kirsten had dreamed about for years: The vows and the pronouncement of husband and wife!

wedding picture

 

After the ceremony was the reception. We ate homemade chicken tika, rice, salad, and veggies. As you can see, the tables were decorated to reflect Kenya, where Kirsten and Stevie met.

groomsmen

We took lots of pictures with the barn as our backdrop. So lovely. I found out later that the barn was only chosen as a background because it was the only place with shade. It really couldn’t have turned out better, though. The red of the barn contrasted nicely with the bride’s white dress and the bridesmaids’ navy blue sundresses.

couplewomenwedding photo familysiblings

After the wedding paparazzi had subsided, it was time for toasts, cake, and celebrating.

cake wedding

ben bre stevie kirsten

One of Kirsten’s aunts made the wedding cake. She even made the edible flowers on top—they aren’t real flowers, believe it or not! They look like the Gerber daisies that the bridesmaids held during the ceremony. The cake stands are made from a tree that Kirsten chose in the forest, as are the stumps that lined the aisle for the ceremony.

wedding cake

The wedding favors were bags of Kenyan chai. This is the best kind of tea in the world. You steep the tea in scalding water, then add almost the same amount of milk as there is tea, and finish it will a ridiculous heap of sugar. A little chai masala sprinkled on top creates perfection. Then you dip your toast or mandazi (doughnuts) in it.

tea

The bubbles on the table were intended for the getaway line, but the kids couldn’t help breaking into them during dinner.bubbles

All of the wedding party introduced themselves and gave a toast. As usual, Ben was hilarious. He has quite the collection of funny stories about the adventures of Ben and Stevie.toasttoast 2

At the end, Stevie and Kirsten sang a song together. You can’t tell from the photo, but Luke and Lisa accompanied on guitar and drum.

wedding couple song

When it was time for the bride and groom to go, we all stood at the edge of the driveway and blew bubbles for them. If was fun to watch as the grown-ups had just as much fun with the bubbles as the kids did! We waved goodbye as they drove away in a cloud of bubbles and balloons.

bubbles

Our Second Anniversary

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Today is a special day for us– our second anniversary! On June 7, 2014, we said “I do” at Whitton Avenue Bible Church in Phoenix, Arizona. It was a beautiful day for us, with a lovely ceremony and a fun reception afterwards! We made a promise to each other that we would spend the rest of our lives together, no matter what. It’s only been two years, but so much has happened in that time.

Johnson Wedding Photo

On June 7, 2015, we celebrated our first anniversary in Indiana. We were there for our friends Phil and McKenna’s  wedding , which had been in Michigan the day before. We woke up on the seventh at our friend Marcus’ house in the Berne, Indiana, a small Swiss town. We spent the day exploring a science museum, Science Central.

Science central

Today, June 7, 2016, we spent the day on our home island, Saint Martin. Since Ben has medical school tests next week, he had to be in class for half the day. But at 3:30, he was mine– he took half the day off to be with me, even though he has a lot to do! We discovered some new hiking trails behind the causeway on the Dutch side. The trail took us and our puppy through the woods, past the Rastafarian Farm, and out into the French capitol, Marigot. We picked low-hanging tamarind seeds to snack on during the walk.

woods

Later, we went to Advantika, a Thai restaurant that was highly recommenced to us. Finally, we went to Carousel for ice cream cake! We eat cake on the seventh of every month to celebrate our marriage. An anniversary called for something special: cookies and cream ice cream cake.

cake

So far, we’ve celebrated both wedding anniversaries in different locations hundreds of miles apart. If things continue as expected, we’ll spend at least the next two in new places. I’ve learned many things from our journeys, but one of the most important is this: “home” doesn’t mean a specific geographical location. Rather, “home” is defined as the place your beloved is, wherever that may be.

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